*Guest Blog by Cal* titled Once Upon A Time …

Watch this…

I usually hate nothing more than TV adverts, but this one, well this one is brilliant. In the sixty seconds it lasts I find myself completely mesmerized and immersed in it. I don’t know whether it’s the dialogue or the fact that Dustin Hoffman is delivering it because I could listen to him talk all day. But what I do know is that each time I watch it makes me think of the subject he mentions… Stories. Like is mentioned in the clip, a story can make you laugh, laugh so hard that your stomach hurts, they can make you cry, they can make you question yourself, reminisce of times gone by or people you miss, remind you of good things to come and in some cases can completely turn a life around or completely change it all together whether for good or bad.

I love stories. Not necessarily my own though because I’m terrible for telling a story and realising half way through or worse once I’ve finished it that I’m the only one who finds it funny or interesting.But I love listening to other people stories. I don’t care if it’s a story about them washing their hair in the morning, going down to the shop to buy a pint of milk or if it’s a more serious one about something that’s upsetting you or your going through at the time. I just love it when someone shares their story.

For me personally I love sitting and listening to stories from my family. Take my Dad for instance. My Dad is brilliant at telling stories. I love hearing of times when he worked on the rigs, stories that you know are disgusting and you shouldn’t laugh but still find yourself still completely creased over at. Or my Mum who a lot of the time can’t tell stories because she is too busy laughing herself. And then there’s Dave, my Step-Dad, who is terrible for telling really bad jokes or stories from his “Essex background” and sometimes we’re “lucky” to hear the same story more than once.

But my point is this… This advert sparked the trail of thought that made me realise that even though I love hearing peoples stories, that sometimes I take them for granted or don’t fully appreciate them. Sometimes people talk about something that doesn’t usually interest me, Something I might not agree with or I sometimes take it for granted that the person telling me the story or the person in the story will be around for years to come. The best example of this would be the recent passing of my Grandad Pete, well my step-grandad technically but I looked up to him enough that I just looked at him as if he was my Grandad. I loved it when he would tell stories of the troubles and strifes he would be having that week with his wife Belle, or when Dad mentioned the two of them, at times I genuinely thought that if the BBC filmed them they would be the new big double act. But I took it for granted I would be able to enjoy a new story every week for years to come. But now that he is gone I miss those stories.

It’s so easy to not see the importance in a story, to just dismiss it as ‘Just another conversation’ or not give the person to tell their story in the first place as sometimes our own ego and attention seeking seems more important than listening to the other person. I know I’m more guilty of that as anyone. But this advert, for something as simple as a new TV channel has challenged me to more of an effort to listen to others, to share in the brilliance of a story, their story, together.

(You can check out Cal’s blog out at tbsiamb and do feel free to post any thoughts/comments you have)

(Fragmentz would like to Thank Cal very much for agreeing to be a Guest Blogger :))

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Quitting ‘Post a Day 2011’

the title of this blog says it all really.

And Yes, I am aware that it is only a week into the project. Maybe I have not even done a whole week.

I know some people may be smiling and thinking ‘I knew she wouldn’t do it’. Thats fine. I don’t mind. I can admit when I fail at something. And this is one of those times.

The concept of Post a Day 2011 came from WordPress itself, the people who I blog through. And its a great idea. For some people. I was excited about it, and thought it was something I could achieve. And in fact, I still think it is something I could achieve, however it is not something I WANT to achieve. And the reasons are as follows …

When I created Fragmentz, the blog, it was with the view of blogging about things that I had in my head, on my mind. It was intended as an outlet. It is a space where I write things that sometimes I find difficult to talk about in real life ( lets talk about rape … being such a post to give an example). Its a space where I can air my thoughts, my poems, my writings, my struggles with life, faith, the world around me, health, depression and other such things. I want it to continue being that space.

Its a space where I have been true to myself, and want to continue being so. And that means not posting things for the sake of it. And thats what I realised the other night, when I was at home, after a very long and weary day, at work, and when my mood was not at its best. I was about to go and hide under my duvet when I realised I had yet to blog … so I trawled through my computer to see what I could find to ‘stick up’ so I could fulfil my quota of ‘daily posting’. I ended up rambling about Glee. Just so I had posted.

That was never what Fragmentz was about. And it isnt.

Hence why I am quitting out of the ‘post a day’ project, and will continue to write/blog here as before.

I hope those of you who have been reading through post a day continue, and if not, then its been nice to briefly be part of your ‘group’ and thank you as ever to those of you who regularly read and keep up to date with the ever changing roller coaster ride of a life that is Fragz.

🙂

Dear Mr Tong …

Dear Mr Tong …

I award you the Institute of Fragmentz 1st class Degree(Hons) in being a Moron.

Well done. You have achieved highly.

You have also no doubt impressed upon some young or vulnerable people that having an illness which is life ruining/threatening at its worst is ‘glamourous’ because to be ‘thin’ is to be good. You could not be more wrong.

You have probably achieved what you set out. Notoriety. People have publicised you without meaning to, people have talked about you, you have trended on twitter (wahoo, bet you are so hugely proud of that) and have caused hurt and upset by the thousands. You have stamped on the lives of people who are unwell with eating disorders, and their families who also endure and suffer.

Some people think you can not be for real, that this is all a ‘stunt’. Some people think you are for real. And are listening. Thats the saddest bit to this. Because either way, what you are doing, and your achievements are of the worst kind. You are unwell yourself.

I hope you one day come the realisation of the harm you may be and are causing and what a complete lunatic you yourself have become. Go get some help.

And please dont be too proud of your Degree, from Fragmentz … as no one else is.

Without Kind Regards,

Fragz.

a short poem by fragz

The below is a poem I have had on the go for many months now. I keep coming back to it, time and time again, to ‘complete’ and yet, every time I do, or every time inspiration has hit, and I think ooh that be part of that poem, by the time I’ve got to write down the thoughts, they’ve gone. So I have concluded that maybe the poem is meant to be unfinished, and there for complete as it is.

The blink of her eyes, the teardrops fall,

as the tired body crumples up against the wall,

no one and nothing to stand her upright

on to the floor she goes, losing her fight

 

The feeling is extreme, rushing through her veins,

Never before has she felt such pain,

In the middle of the night, when silence is all around,

Who is there to cry out to?

 

365 things I am grateful for …

So, along side my ambitous ‘post a day 2011’ attempt, I am also going to attempt to do a 365 (which seems to be all the rage) attempt at things I am grateful for.

In time, within the next few days, this is going to become a ‘page’ on my blog, and I am going to try and daily add something that I am grateful for. The only clause I add to this, is again, the same one with the blog posting, that its an attempt. I may do one a day sometimes, I may do three in one day if i’ve backlogged a little. Every now and then I will promote I am doing this, but I wont ‘tweet’ it every day, unless i’ve specifically blogged about it.

I also may ‘blog’ properly about some of the things I put onto the grateful list, and again I may not. Some things will be mega things, and again some things will be little.

We’ll see how it goes. For the first few, until I have got the page set up, I’ll blog … so

Number 1) the roof i have over my head.